Enjoying 35!

So this is it...

This is what it feels like to be in control of yourself. I always wondered what Janet Jackson was singing about! I do not have make excuses for being me. Why do so many people worry about getting older and shudder at the thought that God has given them another year with friends and family members?

I feel the seasons of my life changing and the hesitation I thought of before was nothing but the Devil trying to keep me from realizing my full potential. The next step that I have to take before I can enter a new land so to speak.

Being all things to all people is leaving me as a fragmented shell to sleep with at night. I am tired of wondering when it will be my turn. I have realized that right now is my turn. How exciting!!!

So this year so far I thank God for saving me, my family and friends, my church family, my job and the protection of the Holy Spirit. I think about all the times I have been almost paralyzed by stupid decisions... I do wonder how I made it over! A little preachy but I am getting comfortable with this type of talk as I am called to be different in my walk. I can no longer act as if I only pray on Sundays and that I attend services to be seen and not to truly worship the Lord with my tongue and to walk before him in every corner of my life.

Funny how I was living one way at this moment and then switch up behavior because an important person walks in the room or the expectations are changed when a certain person is mentioned. the goal these days is to now be a better person to myself and to not try to step in place of their relationship with God. Do not laugh or get me wrong i never thought of my self in that way it's just that I realize that it is such a personal thing that when a person needs help it doesn't mean that I have to take action. More importantly is that we leave things that are bigger than us to God the father -- our problems are to big for us but God is bigger than our problems!

So the next step is finding a comfortable "Glass Slipper" (or an old slipper) in this new year of realization.

I have planned to stop multi tasking friends. If I can't give it my full attention then it can wait or it will be handled accordingly without my silly hands.

I am in charge of my finances. Suggestions and advice are nice. I am responsible for my own decisions whether others agree or approve or not.

When the outcome of any personal, professional or financial decision is made I am responsible for the outcome to a limit. The success and failure of such decisions are mine. why try and hide them or be embarrassed. I can only do so much and then i may have to walk away learning from that situation.

More importantly is to cherish the people in my life who really know me and still love me in spite of all my faults. Now for my sisters reading this please stop rolling your eyes -- for my auntie who remembers the streak in me I love you too and for all others who are wondering what I am talking about just know that you are loved by a funny crazy lady who has just begun a new chapter... welcome to my world!